Pregnant and considering adoption, Illinois, Indiana Agency

"My birthparent advocate supported me every step of the way. She helped me understand my options, obtain community and other resources, select the "perfect" family and explore my feelings." Amy

Experiencing an unplanned pregnancy can be very difficult. We're sure you're considering all of your options, weighing what is best for your baby as well as trying to take care of yourself. Reading through countless pages of information on the Worldwide Web can be confusing or even a little overwhelming.

The Center will provide you with an own advocate who will offer the support you need to explore your options. Your advocate will give you lots of information and choices, but the decisions are yours alone. The Adoption Center staff is professional, caring and knowledgeable, and several have had personal experience with adoption. We offer a full range of adoption services which are free to birth parents and completely confidential.

Every woman has the right to receive information and emotional support throughout her pregnancy and afterwards, too. We will discuss your options regarding openness, and provide you with choices of many wonderful adoptive families. If you wish to speak with someone who has already placed a child for adoption, we can arrange a phone or in-person meeting.

Explaining your rights and options.
Choices of pre-screened adoptive families.
Information about open adoption.
Support and counseling.
Help with expenses.
Privacy and confidentiality.

Working with a small adoption agency is a very personal experience. You can be confident that our staff will respect your decisions and your privacy. You won't be shuffled between staff. You will work with an experienced adoption counselor whose job is to assist you every step of the way. In a private adoption, the adoption attorney is retained by the adoptive parents to represent their interests (not yours). When you work with this adoption agency, your well-being is of utmost importance.

You will have emotional support as you explore adoption.
You make the decisions for yourself and your baby.
You select the adoptive parents.
You determine the amount and type of contact.
You will be treated with respect and dignity.
We'll be here for you as long as you like.

In order to make the best plan for your baby, it is important to have all of your questions answered by someone knowledgeable and understanding. Please read through the questions below to find answers to your questions. Please call us at 1-800-869-1005 or send an email to info@centerforfamily.com

There are many reasons why a pregnant woman may choose adoption; A single mother may want her baby to be raised in a two-parent, stable household; A couple may feel they’re too young or lacking the financial resources to raise a child. Others may want to complete their education, or they may be having relationship problems. Sometimes a mother who is raising other kids may decide that parenting another child would be too difficult given her lack of resources. Even a married couple may feel that their relationship is too unstable, or that they are not ready for another child.

Whatever the reasons, an important question to ask yourself is whether now is the right time for you to bring this child into your family. Being able to recognize ones own limits is very important. If this is not the right time in your life to parent this child, making an adoption plan is a loving, selfless, and responsible choice.

Placing a baby for adoption is a special way of showing your love and maturity. With adoption, you would be giving your child the gift of life, a loving family and wonderful opportunities for their future. Your child's adoptive parents will understand the importance of sharing information in an honest and straightforward manner. Your child will grow up knowing the love and self sacrifice that went into your adoption plan.

Of course. Your Birthparent Advocate will present you with choices of many wonderful families eagerly awaiting the arrival of a baby. You will have the opportunity to select the family yourself. You may meet the prospective parents and spend time with them, talk on the telephone, or exchange letters or e-mails. You will have a say in how much (or little) contact you will have with the adoptive parents.

It is very important that you and the adoptive parents discuss the kind of contact you will want both before and after the placement. Following a placement, some birthparents choose to receive letters and photos once or twice a year; others want updates more regularly, and still others want less frequent contact. Sometimes the contact occurs by phone, mail or email, and some birth and adoptive parents have ongoing visits. It is important to choose parents whose ideas about ongoing contact are similar to your own.

You will know because you are able to choose the parents, spend time together and get to know them. Also, the adoptive parents must complete a homestudy to be eligible to adopt through our agency. The homestudy process is quite extensive. It involves several interviews (with a social worker) to assess their stability, lifestyle, ideas about parenting, experience with children and their medical and financial circumstances. Adoptive families attend training, have criminal background checks and they must provide references. Their home is also visited to ensure it is a safe environment for a child. .

Many different resources and programs are designed to assist pregnant women with their expenses. We will help you apply for any public assistance or insurance benefits to which you are entitled. You may also receive financial assistance to cover pregnancy- related expenses. An attorney is involved in every adoption, and she/he will help to ensure that your adoption plan complies with the laws in your state and protects you and your child.

The law protects birthfathers� rights, which vary from state to state. It will be important for us to follow the laws in your state regarding notification of the father. Working with an attorney, we follow all the legal steps to ensure that the adoption is binding. Some birthfathers are actively involved in planning their child’s adoption and we are happy to work with the two of you together or separately. If the birthfather is not involved, and we are able to locate him, he is asked to participate in the adoption. If we are unable to locate a birthfather or he refuses to cooperate, there are steps we would follow to ensure that your adoption plan is secure.

Every mother worries about the health of her baby and hopes to have a healthy child. Although it is rare, there are times when a birthmother discovers that she may be carrying a child with special needs. Birthmothers facing this kind of situation need extra support and care. There are families who are waiting to adopt children with special needs. We will do all that we can to help you find a family who can provide the love and care that this special child will need.

The answer is "yes." Every birthmother is unique and has a different set of circumstances, hopes and dreams.

Susan is a 34-year-old woman who is the single parent of a four-year-old girl. She also has a 16 year-old son living nearby with his father. Susan enjoys spending time with her teenage son on the weekends. When Susan learned she was pregnant again, she was quite concerned. She wants this baby to grow up with two parents who have a loving, stable marriage. Therefore, Susan decided to consider adoption. Today, she and her children visit with her two year old and his adoptive family twice a year. The adoptive family looks forward to these times together.

Anna and Jim met in college. They had dated for a year when they found out that Anna was pregnant. Both Anna and Jim wanted to finish school before raising a family. They chose the adoptive parents together. Now Anna is working on her masters degree and keeps in touch with her daughter's adoptive family through phone calls, pictures and updates. Jim found a job in the area and he enjoys receiving pictures every Christmas.

Nicole was a junior in high school when she became pregnant. She wondered how she would ever finish school and enjoy her teenage years if she raised this child. With the support of her parents and her birthparent advocate, Nicole selected an adoptive family. Nicole will graduate high school this spring and is very proud of herself. She communicates with her son's adoptive family through periodic phone calls and exchanging letters and pictures.

Now in their late 20's, Lisa and John have been married six years and have three children together. John lost his construction job and had difficulty finding work. They were struggling to pay their rent and feed their two small children. They felt it would be difficult financially and emotionally to add another child to their family. It was important to Lisa and John for the new baby to grow up with brothers and sisters. The adoptive family they chose had one child by birth and two children by adoption. Although Lisa and John developed a close relationship with the adoptive parents before their son was born, they did want ongoing contact. Their son's adoptive family sends an annual photograph to the Center in case Lisa and John change their mind about receiving updates.

Just like birthparents, adoptive families are all unique. The one thing they all have in common is a desire to bring a child into their family and provide him/her with a wonderful life.

Jamie and Bob have experienced many years of infertility and miscarriages before deciding to build their family through adoption. Bob is an executive in a large public relations firm and Jamie is a freelance photographer. Jamie plans to reduce her work schedule to only one evening a week, so that she can be a stay-at-home mom. Bob is home in the evenings so childcare is not an issue. They live in a suburb of Chicago in a kid- filled neighborhood.

Fran has always dreamed of becoming a mother some day. Fran is a 35-year-old attorney, who admits to not putting any free time into dating. Although she is not married, she decided to explore adoption. Fran is very close to her extended family and baby-sits her young niece and nephew on weekends. Her parents, two siblings and their families live within minutes of each other. Fran is very involved in her church community and plans to share her religious values with a child.

Pam and Pete have been married for nine years. They both come from large families and have always hoped to have many children. Two years after their marriage, they gave birth to Theresa. Three years have gone by and Pam has not been able to become pregnant. Now they hope to fulfill their dreams of another baby through adoption. Theresa is very excited at the prospect of being an older sister.

If I place my baby for adoption, will I truly be okay and will my life ever get back to normal?

Yes, you will be okay. Placing a child for adoption is perhaps the most difficult decision you will ever make in your life. The best answer to this question comes from other women who have made an adoption plan. They tell us that things gets easier over time. They go on with their lives, get married, have other children, find employment and finish school. Nevertheless, they say that they will always hold a special place in their hearts for the child they placed for adoption. Birthparents say that any sadness they feel is balanced by knowing the love, security and wonderful life that their child's adoptive parents are able to provide.